#stillBORN Campaign - Grayson's story of bereavement care

Published on: 22/01/2016

In 2013 I was expecting my first baby, a little boy who we named Grayson.

At the time I thought I was receiving good maternity care, but then I went overdue by 2 days. We’d been to hospital 4 days prior to being overdue with reduced movement, they told me everything was ok after being put on the monitor, I was sent home confident he would arrive soon.

grayson2Two days overdue I woke up as usual and noticed Grayson was a little quiet. I phoned my midwife to be told to call the maternity unit, I did so, and was told to drink something hot then cold and lie on my left side to see if he awoke, if not, to call them back. This didn’t work and he still remained quiet. I phoned them back and was told to go to delivery to be monitored.

Once we arrived I was hooked up to the machine only to be told the heartbreaking news that our baby boy had died inside me and there was no heartbeat there. The next few hours were a blur, but the hospital staff were remarkable, they took us into a room where I was to deliver Grayson 2 days later. Two days later we returned and I gave birth to a perfectly formed baby boy weighing 8lb 9oz.

They allowed us to stay in for as long as we needed to spend time with Grayson, they dressed him for us, took pictures and printed his hand and footprints, all placed in a memory box.

grayson3Three years down the line I have gone onto have 2 more children, another little boy called Casper and a little girl called Layla. My midwife with both Casper and Layla was absolutely amazing! She is fantastic and nothing seemed to much, even me calling her at midnight one night as I was concerned. She was always there for me and delivered both my children for me with such care and patience.

My consultant was also amazing, seeing me every 4 weeks and getting me regular scans to put my mind at ease. She also insured I was induced at 37 weeks with Casper and Layla to insure it didn’t happen again. I cannot thank them both enough for the time and effort they both put in insuring we had the family we always wanted, and since telling the hospital my story they have changed the way they monitor calls now and anyone with reduced movements is bought straight in and checked over.

I hope my journey shows that sometimes there is light at the end of a very dark tunnel.

Hannah Tate and Ben Cottage