We have been together for seven years, married for nearly four. We clicked as soon as we met, I knew one day I would marry him as we were best friends. We tried for five years to get pregnant, we didn’t think it was going to happen. I went to the doctors to see what we could do, about a month later I was sick all the time, I never thought I would be pregnant. It wasn’t until my mum said you might be pregnant I realised I didn’t know when my last period was, so I took the test expecting it to say negative as we’d been trying for so long. The test read 2-3 weeks, I was shaking. I couldn’t believe it, we were both in shock, we were finally going to be a family. I know everyone says wait until you are 12 weeks to tell people but we were too excited. My mum was so happy and it’s all that me and my sister would talk about. I knew we were having a boy, I just had a feeling.
I was in and out of hospital as I had to take iron tablets, then one night there was this big gush. I was 21 + 5, I rang my midwife who said I should go straight to hospital, “sounds like your waters have broken”. I cried all the way there hoping it wasn’t true but it was confirmed. My mum rushed down, she lived two hours away. The doctors said I would go into labour and that my baby would die, it would be a miscarriage. I was heart broken I thought “It’s not a miscarriage, it’s my baby boy.
I was left in a side room, I only got to listen to my boys heartbeat when I asked to. I had to ask about tablets or blood pressure to be done. I was in hospital for 5 days and was told all the time my baby will die. I asked for steroid injections to see if it would work but was declined. I was sent home on the Friday because they wanted the bed, they couldn’t do anything for me. I was told I had to go back on the Monday for a scan that went well , I think they said my boy was passing water and there was a little bit more than the last scan. On the Thursday they listened to my boys heartbeat and said all was ok. That night I woke up at 2.50am in agony, just had back pain, nothing else but it was so bad. We rang the hospital and they asked us to get a taxi down as I do not drive. Luckily my father in law took us. As I got into the room I delivered my little boy 20mins later. I was screaming “Is he alive?!” After asking 5 times a midwife turned to me and just said “no”. My world had fallen apart after 5 long years. Our little boy was in heaven. It appeared I was having contractions when I was at the hospital on the Thursday.
It’s been 13 months now since our little boy, Tommy John Carmody was born, 6 days after my birthday on 22nd January. I do believe that if the hospital had helped a bit more with steroids instead of just saying my baby will die, we might have him here today. Our lives will never be the same and if we ever do have another baby I will never go back to that hospital.