#stillBORN campaign - Ella Rose's story of reduced movement

Our Daughter Ella Rose was stillborn on 27th July 2015 and we wanted to share her story with you.

I remember the day so clearly that I found out I was pregnant with Ella, I had been recovering from a miscarriage 3 months prior and was due a smear. I hadn’t been feeling great headaches and some nausea but, I just put it down to being run down after the miscarriage. The doctor did a urine and sample and then came “Emma you are Pregnant” I was gobsmacked and so happy that I just started crying. I was so over the moon that after the loss of our first child at 10 weeks I was expecting again, I called my partner who was completely speechless.

We waited for those anxious 12 weeks and everything was normal and healthy, then 20 weeks came and she was still healthy, we got all the way to 40 weeks and she had been perfectly normal and healthy.

I hit 40 weeks on the Wednesday and she had slowed her movement a little and at my 40-week appointment her heartbeat was a little slow but, we put it down to sleep time. I went from my midwife appointment to see my consultant who booked me in for induction on the Friday.

Wednesday night I noticed that she wasn’t moving too much but, she still had her standard hiccups at 3 in the morning so, I wasn’t worried. On Thursday she wasn’t moving too much again and I could feel myself worrying but, I kept telling myself it’s all ok she will be here tomorrow there is no need to go to the hospital.

Friday came and we went to our induction appointment where I had to have a scan to check the position of her head as this is standard procedure with bigger girls. The sonographer was talking us through the scan and said her head was in the right position, she continued scanning and I was watching the screen. The scanning continued for what felt like forever and then I said “You can’t see her heartbeat can you?” I knew what I was looking for on the screen, that little white flutter but, it wasn’t there.

Those fateful words of “I am so sorry I can’t find her heartbeat” will remain with me for the rest of my life. I remember laying there wailing whilst two other people tried to find her and then the consultant tried and it was confirmed she had died. We were taken off to have a final scan where they found that there was very little fluid around her yet my waters had not appeared to have gone.

We were spoken to by the midwives who explained what would happen next which, was to take a pill to thin my cervix and go home and come back Sunday to be induced. I spent 36 hours in shock rubbing my bump crying and hoping that they were wrong.

We arrived at the hospital Sunday around lunch time where we were admitted to our own private room and the induction was started, by 2am I was in full labour and our little raven-haired beauty was finally born at 7.11am weighing just 5lbs9oz. It appeared that she had been in distress at some stage as she had done a poo and did have the cord around her neck however, we are unsure if that was the cause. We spent the whole of Monday afternoon admiring how beautiful she was, she had a full head of jet black hair, the cutest feet you have ever seen and this adorable button nose, she was perfect!

6 months on and I don’t think either of us are even nearly healed and I honestly don’t think we ever will be but, I do know that should I ever have another child that I will listen to my instincts and my body when its telling me something isn’t right.

My advice to any expectant mum always listen to your body and never feel or let anyone make you feel that you are being silly, it’s better to get things checked out than wait and hope everything is ok.

Emma Groves